"On the first day, God created light and dark and saw that it was good. We disagreed and called it powercuts.
On the second day, God created plants and trees and saw that it was good. We disagreed as the leaves blown in blocked our hoover.
On the third day, God created all the birds of the air and saw that it was good. We disagreed because the resident blackbird pooped on the carpet. Also, birdwatchers are grumpy, crazy and bad tippers.
On the fourth day, God created the animals and saw that it was good. We disagreed for there was cow dung trailed in on the bottom of somebody's wellies."
Here's to the rest of the week. Holding out for Sunday...
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